I got here via Bowen that talked about you on his substack...
This post of yours really resonated with me guess because I've had similar insight during my early days of battling to get sober. The trick for me was Allen Carr's book "Easyway" where he talked about this principle. Once the penny dropped I was a free man just like that!
So I'm a rookie, totally new here in substack and has a true story to tell that might resonate with you. I've been sharing it for a couple of years with other buddies in private. We're a sober collective where the power of love has healed many.
Now I want to share it with the world cause the power of a collective, community, connection is totally undervalued in this egoistic, liquid modernity era. I want to build such a collective here on substack and work with others that might feel the same way or at least support what we are trying to do.
Getting sober is still such a huge struggle for me. I go through fits and starts. It's THE hardest thing I have ever tried to achieve in my life so far. Thank you for your words, Dee. They are exactly what I needed to read today.
I appreciate this in-your-face approach and I agree. Because I am not a moderate, or normie, kind of person it is so much easier for me to never. The one tool I add to my toolbox, beyond what you mentioned, is questioning my thoughts about alcohol. It's rare that desire wiggles in but if it does I can easily call it for what it is now.
Thank you Donna 🙏 Abstinence is the only way for me—that’s for sure. I’ve learned that over and over. Once you eliminate something from your life it quits being an option. Getting sober is not easy. Staying sober is easier with time.
It was easier for me when I did it the second time after shifting my mindset to become a non-drinker from the inside out. The first time I spontaneously declared I was quitting for one year I had to white knuckle it to the finish line because I hadn’t made any other life changes to support my sobriety. Lessons!
I’m 6 months away from 6 years of sobriety after 25 years of failing to manage my alcohol use.
Drinking is something that you can put 100,000 hours into practicing and still suck at it.
I have no kill-switch built in, it just never got wired.
After deciding one morning that I never wanted to be hungover and wondering what happened the night before again, I spent nearly 3 months white-knuckling sobriety before taking advantage of an opportunity made possible to me by my previous employer.
(Yes, those stories are intertwined.)
Everything you say resonates and makes sense, and I love hearing it.
Thanks James. I appreciate your comment and your experience. I’d love to hear more some day. I too am missing the brake—all I got was a quick accelerator pedal. ☺️
A solid piece, Dee, and a happy note to strike when you've reached that place of stability. I'm not an authority about any of this, but there is another side of the coin for some: https://substack.com/home/post/p-144173368
To be sure. I hope I made it clear that this path is not for everyone. We don’t celebrate the successes of sobriety enough—but we certainly document the failures and struggles to a great degree.
Same, Dee. I also find sobriety easy (these days). Like many things: it comes down to a simple choice, and we already know the answer.
And, as with many things, I think it’s easy (and seductive) to create more complication and struggle than actually needs to be there. I think that too can be addictive.
"There is strength even in the union of very sorry men." ---Homer, The Iliad
Hi Dee 👋
I got here via Bowen that talked about you on his substack...
This post of yours really resonated with me guess because I've had similar insight during my early days of battling to get sober. The trick for me was Allen Carr's book "Easyway" where he talked about this principle. Once the penny dropped I was a free man just like that!
So I'm a rookie, totally new here in substack and has a true story to tell that might resonate with you. I've been sharing it for a couple of years with other buddies in private. We're a sober collective where the power of love has healed many.
Now I want to share it with the world cause the power of a collective, community, connection is totally undervalued in this egoistic, liquid modernity era. I want to build such a collective here on substack and work with others that might feel the same way or at least support what we are trying to do.
Love never fails 🌾
https://open.substack.com/pub/soberhorseman/p/i-am-sober?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=5g8wzg
Cool beans! Thanks for reading and commenting. I’ll check out the link. The power of community is real 💪🏻👊
15,597 days x 16 hours per day 296 thousand hours awake sober don’t drink and don’t die is the secret. Thanks for your post “XO”
Yessir 🫡
Getting sober is still such a huge struggle for me. I go through fits and starts. It's THE hardest thing I have ever tried to achieve in my life so far. Thank you for your words, Dee. They are exactly what I needed to read today.
I understand K. 🙏
That’s why I didn’t title it: “getting sober is easy.”
It isn’t. It’s so hard—the good news is that there’s hope of one day having that true change of thinking and then it can get easier to stay sober.
I appreciate this in-your-face approach and I agree. Because I am not a moderate, or normie, kind of person it is so much easier for me to never. The one tool I add to my toolbox, beyond what you mentioned, is questioning my thoughts about alcohol. It's rare that desire wiggles in but if it does I can easily call it for what it is now.
This is a great essay Dee, thanks.
Thank you Donna 🙏 Abstinence is the only way for me—that’s for sure. I’ve learned that over and over. Once you eliminate something from your life it quits being an option. Getting sober is not easy. Staying sober is easier with time.
It was easier for me when I did it the second time after shifting my mindset to become a non-drinker from the inside out. The first time I spontaneously declared I was quitting for one year I had to white knuckle it to the finish line because I hadn’t made any other life changes to support my sobriety. Lessons!
This is good stuff my friend, and I live for provocative titles :) God bless your very important work in this space my friend.
Thanks David. 🙏
To tell you the truth, well said, Dee 😎
I see what you did there 😎
I’m 6 months away from 6 years of sobriety after 25 years of failing to manage my alcohol use.
Drinking is something that you can put 100,000 hours into practicing and still suck at it.
I have no kill-switch built in, it just never got wired.
After deciding one morning that I never wanted to be hungover and wondering what happened the night before again, I spent nearly 3 months white-knuckling sobriety before taking advantage of an opportunity made possible to me by my previous employer.
(Yes, those stories are intertwined.)
Everything you say resonates and makes sense, and I love hearing it.
It does get easier.
The doubts evaporate.
Your strength builds from within.
Thank you for sharing.
Thanks James. I appreciate your comment and your experience. I’d love to hear more some day. I too am missing the brake—all I got was a quick accelerator pedal. ☺️
Congrats on the days—that’s massive.
A solid piece, Dee, and a happy note to strike when you've reached that place of stability. I'm not an authority about any of this, but there is another side of the coin for some: https://substack.com/home/post/p-144173368
To be sure. I hope I made it clear that this path is not for everyone. We don’t celebrate the successes of sobriety enough—but we certainly document the failures and struggles to a great degree.
Pretty much all around good advice for everything.
Grateful to find your Stack.
Grateful for seven months of sobriety.
Grateful to find your Stack.
Grateful for seven months of sobriety.
Grateful to find your Stack.
Grateful for seven months of sobriety.
Grateful to find your Stack.
Grateful for seven months of sobriety.
Grateful to find your Stack.
Grateful for seven months of sobriety.
Same, Dee. I also find sobriety easy (these days). Like many things: it comes down to a simple choice, and we already know the answer.
And, as with many things, I think it’s easy (and seductive) to create more complication and struggle than actually needs to be there. I think that too can be addictive.