I'm a bike racer (at least I still identify as a "bike racer" even though I'm 57 and don't race competitively any longer) and I only ever won ... two races. All the others, I lost. Sure, bike racing is like that. A field of 100, you have very low odds. But I raced at a very high level, and I was what was known as a "worker" or a support rider. I had to ride back to the team car and get food for others, I had to pull shitty miles into the wind, I had to stop and give my wheel up if a team leader punctured, I had to sacrifice my chances so someone else would have better chances. I accepted this, and I took my role seriously.
I would tell people this, and they didn't get it. They didn't get that I lost so many races. End of the day, I loved the process more than anything. I especially loved the long training rides with guys who are still dear friends of mine. I turned a lot of miles with friends who I knew were better than me, and that's OK. I loved riding, I loved racing, and I loved the suffering that came with it because it was all part of the process.
Funny, this essay also made me think about professional bike racing. When I started watching Grand Tours, I loved the sport for just this reason. It’s a “win” for a cyclist to do the day’s job, which might not look like a “win” to a newcomer. A support rider earns glory by sacrificing individual glory, except on a rare day. Nuance like that is unusual in sports. It’s a thing of beauty to see a high-functioning team race.
.. seems there’s n awful lotta highly diverse Buyin & Sellin round this joint & thus also pretty arguable there’s one hell of a lotta ‘prospectin goin on here .. So what else is TV Advertising or Selling One’s Opinion or Analysis or KnowHow or BlindFury even via substack ? .. haha & some are Selling Their ‘TrueConfessions or ‘Immaculate ‘Conceptions via ‘SobStack ! (grin 🦎🏴☠️) This joint’s a Phenomena & Cornucopia ! I been very CLEAR what I’m Selling here .. & in the Ongoing Process of trying to reheat / breathe Life back into Three of mebbe 10-12 ‘Irons In The Fire - I had/have - on the go - Many ‘Irons haha.. were ‘Home Runs or even helped a compadre’s ship come in.. bueno ! Will reread your notion of ‘acceptance .. and perhaps consider ‘the main thing Big Vested Interests are adamant on is ‘Certainty.. & whether that ‘Best Practice Profits via ‘Acceptance.. I’ve a pretty good notion who’s on the Menu eh ! Qui Bono ?? asks the Rave On guy !
.. have mentioned ‘Boosterism.. & think it fits into your perspective on Losing / Winning & certainly suggest you consider Gambling - Legal & Illegal in the Context of ‘th Sportin Life eh ! And to claim Political Parties are Addicted to Gambling Profits is obvious - once Forming Government ! Holy Moly Shades of Mammon !Now don’t forget. the ‘scalpers & their WarCry .. ‘Who’s SELLIN ! I’m Buyin ! Whaddyaa GOT ! Who NEEDS TICKETS ! ! People makin deals & ‘scalpin ‘Tickets To Their SubRide .. But Wait ! There’s Always More ! MoreGalore where that comes from ! CALL NOW ! Not Available In Stores ANYWHERE.. !
Was a big Jerry Kramer fan.. ol ‘zipperhead - a ‘sure enuff Winner ! And not just on th Gridiron - not sure where he stands re ‘Acceptance.. might say the Very Same re Jackie Robinson - I certainly do like where yer coming from on Winning or Losing - But ! Your Conclusion ‘blindsided me ! & we ain’t even gotten into ‘Cheating hoho ! 🦎🏴☠️🧨
We all root for the underdog, the little guy, the washout, all the Cinderellas and Rudys, the losers. Why? Because they show us that we, the Everyman loser, can win sometimes. But first we have to lose, bummer! Good post.
Wisdom here. Was discussing lately how folks shouldn't get too many points for "good" behavior while all is going well. It's how we show up when shit's gone wrong--when we've lost--that says so much more about who we are and, to your point, may show us who we want to be.
It's so hard and so necessary, this losing business! I love and appreciate the way you finished off this fine essay Dee, acceptance is key and we get in the way of our own self far too often.
This has been one of my biggest frustrations as a parent over the last 20 years. Every organization my kids joined had a participation mindset rather than winning and losing. Kids don't get that same lesson we did growing up from community programs and school. So we have to make sure to teach them at home. I was relentless and brutal at board and video games until eventually they started beating me. Also, thanks for the introduction to Sam.
Thanks for this! Even losers contribute, sometimes greatly. I played fastball on the base team and couldn’t hit worth shit. So I became the sacrifice. I had no problem stepping in front of the pitch and could aim my bunt wherever I pleased. It helped I was fast, one of the top base stealers, so I always made it to first and got a man on for the heavy hitters behind me.
Embrace the suck.
😎
I'm a bike racer (at least I still identify as a "bike racer" even though I'm 57 and don't race competitively any longer) and I only ever won ... two races. All the others, I lost. Sure, bike racing is like that. A field of 100, you have very low odds. But I raced at a very high level, and I was what was known as a "worker" or a support rider. I had to ride back to the team car and get food for others, I had to pull shitty miles into the wind, I had to stop and give my wheel up if a team leader punctured, I had to sacrifice my chances so someone else would have better chances. I accepted this, and I took my role seriously.
I would tell people this, and they didn't get it. They didn't get that I lost so many races. End of the day, I loved the process more than anything. I especially loved the long training rides with guys who are still dear friends of mine. I turned a lot of miles with friends who I knew were better than me, and that's OK. I loved riding, I loved racing, and I loved the suffering that came with it because it was all part of the process.
Thanks for commenting. I remember similar experiences during my MB racing days. Getting my ass kicked all the time but so worth the effort. 🙏
Funny, this essay also made me think about professional bike racing. When I started watching Grand Tours, I loved the sport for just this reason. It’s a “win” for a cyclist to do the day’s job, which might not look like a “win” to a newcomer. A support rider earns glory by sacrificing individual glory, except on a rare day. Nuance like that is unusual in sports. It’s a thing of beauty to see a high-functioning team race.
Yes it is. Thanks for reading Tara 🙏
.. seems there’s n awful lotta highly diverse Buyin & Sellin round this joint & thus also pretty arguable there’s one hell of a lotta ‘prospectin goin on here .. So what else is TV Advertising or Selling One’s Opinion or Analysis or KnowHow or BlindFury even via substack ? .. haha & some are Selling Their ‘TrueConfessions or ‘Immaculate ‘Conceptions via ‘SobStack ! (grin 🦎🏴☠️) This joint’s a Phenomena & Cornucopia ! I been very CLEAR what I’m Selling here .. & in the Ongoing Process of trying to reheat / breathe Life back into Three of mebbe 10-12 ‘Irons In The Fire - I had/have - on the go - Many ‘Irons haha.. were ‘Home Runs or even helped a compadre’s ship come in.. bueno ! Will reread your notion of ‘acceptance .. and perhaps consider ‘the main thing Big Vested Interests are adamant on is ‘Certainty.. & whether that ‘Best Practice Profits via ‘Acceptance.. I’ve a pretty good notion who’s on the Menu eh ! Qui Bono ?? asks the Rave On guy !
.. have mentioned ‘Boosterism.. & think it fits into your perspective on Losing / Winning & certainly suggest you consider Gambling - Legal & Illegal in the Context of ‘th Sportin Life eh ! And to claim Political Parties are Addicted to Gambling Profits is obvious - once Forming Government ! Holy Moly Shades of Mammon !Now don’t forget. the ‘scalpers & their WarCry .. ‘Who’s SELLIN ! I’m Buyin ! Whaddyaa GOT ! Who NEEDS TICKETS ! ! People makin deals & ‘scalpin ‘Tickets To Their SubRide .. But Wait ! There’s Always More ! MoreGalore where that comes from ! CALL NOW ! Not Available In Stores ANYWHERE.. !
Was a big Jerry Kramer fan.. ol ‘zipperhead - a ‘sure enuff Winner ! And not just on th Gridiron - not sure where he stands re ‘Acceptance.. might say the Very Same re Jackie Robinson - I certainly do like where yer coming from on Winning or Losing - But ! Your Conclusion ‘blindsided me ! & we ain’t even gotten into ‘Cheating hoho ! 🦎🏴☠️🧨
☺️ solid commentary. Thanks!
We all root for the underdog, the little guy, the washout, all the Cinderellas and Rudys, the losers. Why? Because they show us that we, the Everyman loser, can win sometimes. But first we have to lose, bummer! Good post.
Thanks Tim ☺️
I’ve learned way more from my losses than wins!
Indeed. Thanks for reading
Wisdom here. Was discussing lately how folks shouldn't get too many points for "good" behavior while all is going well. It's how we show up when shit's gone wrong--when we've lost--that says so much more about who we are and, to your point, may show us who we want to be.
💯 Holly. Thanks for reading. 🙏
Thanks Dee. Wonderful also to hear you read this.
Your focus is so clear. It’s the folks who keep on keepin on who end up with a homerun eventually ❣️
🙏
Y A Tittle
Y knot?
Great missive and voice. Reminds me of Steve Job’s humility when he came back to Apple after being fired.
Thank you Hilda. I’ve not often been compared to SJ 😂 but I appreciate the comment my friend.
It's so hard and so necessary, this losing business! I love and appreciate the way you finished off this fine essay Dee, acceptance is key and we get in the way of our own self far too often.
Thanks Donna. I wish I could share some of it with kids today—they seem so clueless about life 🤷🏻♂️
‘define ‘kids’ thanks ! That’s a ‘sweeping statement .. approx age group ?
I’ll go with the standard definition of “minors” 😎
This has been one of my biggest frustrations as a parent over the last 20 years. Every organization my kids joined had a participation mindset rather than winning and losing. Kids don't get that same lesson we did growing up from community programs and school. So we have to make sure to teach them at home. I was relentless and brutal at board and video games until eventually they started beating me. Also, thanks for the introduction to Sam.
My pleasure sir.
Great piece! "I'm a loser baby."
A perfect ending: “Go forth and lose.”
Thank you James
Dee, This is wonderful. I hope you are thinking of going out on the middle-school pep-rally lecture circuit. Damn, the kids need this.
Ya think? Better than a participation trophy? 😂
Thanks my friend. 🙏
Haha! Way better. 😆
Thanks for this! Even losers contribute, sometimes greatly. I played fastball on the base team and couldn’t hit worth shit. So I became the sacrifice. I had no problem stepping in front of the pitch and could aim my bunt wherever I pleased. It helped I was fast, one of the top base stealers, so I always made it to first and got a man on for the heavy hitters behind me.
Love that. Yes—it’s a team game for sure
Loved this, Dee!